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happy life motherhood parenting

Why having a me time for moms is so important yet so hard to take a break!

Motherhood is a long journey and its important to have a me-time for moms. At some point, every mom had this idea of having a me-time or having a break from the daily routine, yet finding it difficult to do so! Writing for this question has made me think, that when was the last time that I took a break or had a “me time” from home and kids.

Mind you!! 

Wanting a break doesn’t make me or other moms a bad mom!!

After kids’ priorities change for Mothers and so we let go of our passion and dreams. (It is never too late to chase them) But in-between all the chaos, of parenting and responsibilities wanting a break is natural and happens to every mother. 

  •     A small day out with friends, 
  • A dinner date with husband, 
  • or simply a relaxing SPA DIY at home are some of my ideas of a “wanting a break” 

My most favorite happens to be, having a cup of tea in the morning without kids disturbing. Smiling?! Well, most of the time, kids wake up early and we would like to complete a little amount of kitchen work before we could go on with their morning routine. Brush, breakfast and freshen up. In my case, the morning kids’ routine takes up a lot of time.

We think a lot of ideas about what to do when we take a break or having “Me Time” but sometimes we eventually give up on the idea itself!

On a random day with kids! Me time for moms is so important!

Sometimes the decision that we make about the “me time” or something about career, society is always judgemental about such kinds of decisions that moms take. Few statements: 

  • What is the need for her to go for a job?
  • She is careless about her kids and family.
  • Not taking the responsibility of kids and home works.
  • no one has gone to work after becoming a mother in our family.

And, 

  • Log kya kahenge??!!

I feel the last question is the biggest concern. 

But hey, not all are like this, but some people in our society do think of the above questions!

At some point, event mothers think the other way, 

  • Do I need a break right now?
  • Instead of a break I could do this/that work
  • I want to be with kids and not running behind my career.
  • Once kids are in school, I could get back on my job.
  • Once kids are of 5 or 6 years, I will focus on my passion.
  • I have gained a lot of weight.

I am sure every mom had this question at least once, post delivery. Its ok to gain a little weight but being healthy matters. Do read my blog post about Weight Loss after Kids. I am sure you would like it.

Well, the list goes on. But 1 thing, me-time is so important for moms. It feels so refreshed. A small break will go a long way. As I mentioned above, my most favorite is having a cup of tea without disturbance.

Wanting a break or me-time is important for a mom who has younger kids aged 2-6. It’s more chaotic with them. As I have two girls aged 2 and 5, and so it’s been almost 5 years that I and my husband went out on a simple dinner date. I would love to do that. I know it sounds crazy!

I see most of the moms talking about having no time for passion after kids. Yes, agreed! Right after kids, we would be so busy in setting things right. But it’s never too late to chase them, your goals, passion, or your dream job! Also do read my blog post about Happiness, you come to me! I shall wait!

We can always find time if we want to focus on our passion! I usually wake up around 4:45 am and sit to write by 5 am till 7 am, it’s the only time I get to work on my blogs (before kids’ wakeup) This happens to me top favorite “me time” 

Hey momma!! You all must have some kind of interest, right?! Bring that out! Work on it, your passion! Be it writing, art, reading, or music! Bring me time on! Plan your day include your passion in your daily routine or when you are starting, try including it at least twice a week. I feel before kids wake up is the best time to focus. 

You don’t have to be worried about the whole ‘log kya kehenge’ for having me time. It’s you who is going to feel happy and proud while doing so! 

Supportive Family: Having a supportive family and understanding husband is a blessing! They would understand the importance of you having me-time or going for a job after kids. I mean, kids will always be the priority for moms!

In the end, it’s just you, and your family that matters! If you all are happy with the decision you take them the whole log kya kahenge scenario will be out of the question! 

These are the few things that popped up while I was trying to write this blog post about “taking a break for me time and why is it difficult to do so!!” As mothers, we become so busy in our daily life or responsibilities that we forget that we too have some interests, passions, or goals. 

I feel me-time should be normalized and make moms feel comfortable and happy when they take time off from family for her me time! And as I said earlier, wanting a break or having me-time won’t make me or other moms a bad mom!  

Love,

Sadvika Kylash

momlifeandlifestyle

Categories
bodypositive happy life motherhood parenting weight loss

Weight loss after kids

This is one of the major issues that all the moms are facing. And it might be because of the expectations that are laid by society or sometimes by ourselves that we should lose weight after kids. But not just the weight loss but many expectations are set for mothers which makes it hard for mothers to live up to and weight loss after kids is one such thing

  • Do diets work?

Well, I am sure we all did go on a diet and ridiculously failed…? Smiling? Yes! I did too.

Diets work! That is the reason there are so many ideas about it. You just need to be consistent. But just because you are not being able to be consistent on a diet doesn’t mean that you are doing a wrong one or a wrong way. Weight loss after kids is a little hard but don’t be so concerned about it

  • Reasons for a failed attempt to diet:

Whenever you go on a diet, you would be placing restrictions on food. What to eat and what not to! But your body might not accept this because it is a way that your body is trying to survive.

When you start your diet, you are rejecting the food that your body needs.

And as a result, you would be hungrier and constantly think of food that you want to have.

Hunger is something that you can’t ignore and you eventually end up eating a little more.

But hey! This doesn’t mean that you did it wrong. The diet failed you.

Don’t just let one failed attempt of going on a diet affect your self-confidence.

  • Go slow on the term “Diet”

Well, this is something that makes me more concerned. When you are young, you have the self-esteem and energy to do on a vigorous diet. But would you be able to do the same in the late ’70s….?? Maybe not! You won’t be saying – “No sweets please, I am on a diet” right..?

Diet and weight loss is something that you have to go very slow. Aiming for a long-term action plan which works is the key! All other short diets are very hard to stick on!

Taking baby steps with diet and making them a part of your lifestyle matters. As you know, it takes 21 days to build a habit and 90 days for a lifestyle. Weight loss after kids has to be a long term journey.

Mothers do have a lot to deal with, with baby, house chores. For a new mother, it is just not advisable to go on any kind of diet.

  • Our behavior towards food and weight would affect kids:

As it is known that, kids follow parents. And when we say this is “junk food” or “bad” food, they think it that way too. And growing up that would start being more conscious about the above terms.

This includes our beliefs about weight loss too! When we constantly talk about – “I have put on a lot of weight, I want to lose it by diet” It is for sure that kids would make a connection to bigger body size and eating junk food is “bad” and smaller side body and eating less is “good”

Well, this doesn’t mean, you allow them to have chips, cakes, chocolates all day long. Just that making comments about weight around kids would make them more aware and maybe at a point they would think a lot about this!

Perfect Parenting is a myth! From time to time we all learn new things about parenting. But your overall message to kids is what matters, in the end! They learn from you!

  • Motherhood and weight:

I heard many comments about a mother gaining weight after delivery. Yes! It happens and it is very obvious! But hey momma, you can take your time to lose weight. Comments always come in, no matter what you do.

But you have to make a choice, of how you want to deal with it. Firstly, plan things out! Being in a hurry for a faster weight loss would lead you to nowhere! And as a mom, you already have a lot to deal with.

Spending time with kids means, making memories and having fun versus making yourself starve for food. Which would make you more irritated by being hungry. Motherhood comes with a lot of responsibilities, house chores, baby care and you hardly have time for some “me time”

Making the “me time” fun is so important. But going on a diet to lose weight because You have to or because society is judgmental is just not worth it. Do not think that small bodies are happy ones. Thin or healthy, weight loss or no weight loss, eating right, having daily activity matters. Yes, being healthy is good for you, only if you enjoy doing so.

Being a mom is a task and we all mothers have a hard time dealing with it. And while you starve, things would be even harder. As I said in my above paragraph’s plan things up! Set a realistic goal that you could achieve. Start small. Once you could set your daily schedule work things upwards! Exercise daily!

Being a mother is not just doing your part of responsibilities but it is about being a great role model for your kids. Which would make a much bigger impact on both, you and your kids.

In the end, you are the only one who can give your children a happy mother who loves life!! 

Be the best example for your kids. Not just weight loss but anything for that matter. Because kids learn from you! Kids look up to you!

This is my first article on my website. Happy to share this article with you all. I so wanted to write on this as I have seen many mothers struggling to lose weight just because society thinks she is fat.

I hope my article would give you a little motivation about being happy the way you are and accepting your body. i know weight loss after kids is a little challenging but there is more to add to the beautiful journey of motherhood. In the end, when you are happy, your children are happy too!

With so much love to all Super Moms

Sadvika Kylash.

Momlifeandlifestyle.